The message that midnight was clear:
You were my only choice – and I was just an option.
But that didn’t stop me from loving you.
It didn’t stop the butterflies in my belly every time I see your face
Or the goosebumps on my skin whenever I hear your voice
The shivers I get at the thought of you touching me
It spreads over my skin,
My soft skin
As I feel your hands slide over it,
You kiss my neck and rest your cheek against mine
And I can’t help but wonder,
Can you see me?
Can you really see me?
I wanted you to see me beyond the mask
So I wiped off the makeup,
Beyond the clothes I let you take off
Beyond the skin I let you caress
Adrenalin swimming underneath it, to the tips of my fingers and toes curled up in tight fists gripping your shoulders as my thighs caress yours, all the way to the landing pads you chose to crash into as you pulled out your parachute, evasive manoeuvres having me screaming your name like …
And yet I still couldn’t help but wonder… Can you see me?
Can you really see me?
Beyond the skin I let you so easily invade
Giving you the privilege to be and do what others only dreamed of
Hoping that something within may open your eyes to see beyond my double D cups and rounded soft butt,
beyond the smile that I wear on the lips I needed so badly for you to kiss
Beyond the hair that you pulled on which would not come off,
And the eyes that couldn’t stop staring at you who saw right through me.
All the way to the parts I was scared anyone would see.
You saw the thoughts in my head play like movies when the words I said were muted by the fear of the truth….
Or the fear of the lie…
Or the fear of the fact that,
Although to you I was amazing in many ways,
I was still just an option – and you were still my only choice.
And although you could see me clearly,
You couldn’t see that.
Chartus.X 